Eeek. I am going through a phase of screeching at the beginning  and – if you’re very unlucky- at the end of my sentences and declarations. I’m aware that this has the potential to become highly annoying  and has already crossed the cool/uncool line, but I have spent the last few weeks in an excitable state and I need a multi-purpose, non-profane, non-blasphemous exclamation.

“Eeeek” is a highly useful term, which can be used to convey a range of emotions, from stirrings of excitement (eek) to complete ecstasy and joyous flipping-out (eeeeeeeeeeeeeek!) It can also denote anxiety anywhere on the spectrum from slight misgivings (eek)  to intense terror (eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek!) It is great for social networking – not that I waste any time at all on any popular social networking sites because I am a serious writer, darlings, and everyone knows you disconnect from the internet while you are doing dead serious writing. It said so in this article I read on Facebook. Erm. Oops (also  useful declarations but Eeeek’s still my fave).

For example -and purely for illustrative purposes – if I had spent any time at all on Facebook or Twitter recently (and I will bash anyone who says I have) a selection of my posts might read as follows:

• Eeek: helping teach my first creative writing class next month
• Eeeeeek: looking forward to my first time facilitating a writing class tomorrow (maybe a slight fib at that stage)
• Eeeeeeeeeeeek: learners arrive any minute!

In this case, there is some overlap between positive excitement and being scared silly, both of which are captured quite nicely, if I do say so myself.

Other extracts from my (ahem) hypothetical statuses  might include:

• Eeek: packing for long weekend in Prague (Quite an excited one, but (note to self) perhaps a little spoilt and blase -sounding. Consider adding more eee’s )
• Eeeeeeek: my son’s got a mouse in his room at uni and it’s sitting staring at him (Very scary stuff, but if I was nearer and was actually expected to go round and do something about it there would be even more eee’s)
• Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek: shortlisted in short story competition (Some of you who fritter away your time on popular social networking sites may recognise this one. There was a lot of screeching chez moi when I found this out yesterday,  and it may have spilled over into the virtual world. Soz about that. If I actually get placed, I may have to replace the ‘e’ key on my laptop. Buy earplugs now. If not, it’s still worthy of an eek)

A natural perfectionist, I am tempted to check whether I have been consistent in the precise, relative  length of each of my Eeeks in this blog, but I am learning to take risks in my writing; to push the boundaries until there are none, darlings; to go with the organic flow.  I am truly living on the edge. Ee(e/ee/eee)k.